The Princess of the Castle.

Most people play in the park with their parents on lazy summer afternoons when they are small.  They play games, and sing those little kiddie rhymes from the top of the swingset.  

I, unlike those people, go to the park on rainy spring mornings and sing those little kiddie rhymes to no one in particular.  

I'm the princess of the castle, and you're all dirty rascals.  

Actually, I think everyone secretly wants to play on the swings. 

Indulge I say.  

There's that wonderful little place, when swinging, somewhere between going up and coming down, where you can see the whole park kingdom stretched out in front of you before, inevitably, you must decide to come back down, or jump. 

Jump. I always jump. It's way more fun if you jump. 

Lollarama

"Lollarama" is the aptly titled monthly feature of this blog that will display a comprehensive collection of humour.

I saw this as an opportunity to enlighten people on many of stand-up comedy's unsung heroes. I'll begin with the comedy stylings of Christopher Titus. This video is so good that you won't even care about the users' comments.

This is it, there's no use for YouTube anymore. Nobody can make a better video than this. Holy Loly, Mike Gravel. Just when I started to grow weary of all this politickin' and guerilla campaigning for the primary, Mike Gravel comes along to save the day. I'm at a loss of words over this. I have nothing of substance to say, so just watch.

More political comedy relief: Canada's Rhinoceros Party of Canada

Here's an interesting concept: Garfield minus Garfield. A comic about schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and the empty desperation of modern life, and I would have to say that it is much funnier than the original Garfield comics, which isn't say much, because they're not funny at all. 

Lastly, The Adventures of Dr. McNinja. This series of comics is a bit of a commitment, but it's worth it.

Planet Earth

If you're like me and can't think of something good (or reasonable) to ask for on your birthday, ask for the Complete Planet Earth Series on DVD. Even if you don't find every facet of mother nature completely fascinating, some of the footage captured is mindblowing and it really opens your eyes to what exactly is out there on this crazy planet. Like axolotls. They're not featured, but I like them, so here's a picture:

The eleven disc series covers specific environments, ranging from pole to pole, such as mountains, deserts, shallow seas, and the great plains. The hardworking folk over at BBC have hidden under tarps in jungles and spent months with cockroaches in some caves to provide the people with gorgeous close up shots of never before caught on tape snow leopards to terrifying scenes of the vampire squid from hell. The fact that something like this underwater cave was molded by natural causes over many, many years is incredible. And have you ever seen this unworldly fungi? And besides, with Sir David Attenborough narrating, how can it not be good?

Potpourri

I am introducing Potpourri as a monthly article on this cozy blog, where I'll feature things that I personally find interesting, be it news articles, youtube videos, but don't really warrant an entire post.

Everyone has a tiny pyrotechnic spirit inside of them, which is why I think you should watch this. I'm going to try it out very soon, but what I'm not going to do is throw it at someone after yelling hadouken. It is really cool though, as the video title states.

USB jump drives are common nowadays, and I actually saw one of these lego USB jump drives floating around on campus a while ago. I think this is a neat way to decorate your jump drive, if you actually even care about it. If you aspire to do it, I recommend you try it with a dummy jump drive first, something you don't use or care about... you might snap the actual USB drive in half. 

I like to read up on useless factoids that can somehow relate to me, including this - the #1 song on my birthdate was "One More Try" by George Michael. You can find yours here, and many other #1 songs dating back to the late 20th century. I've never even heard my birthdate song. The only George Michael I know is the one from Arrested Development.

The Graphic Imperative

Often, visuals are just what people need to become socially concious about the atrocities of this world. A couple of years ago, I discovered a website with a collection of such a brand of art - the appropriately titled "The Graphic Imperative". It's the kind of art that makes you stroke your chin in contemplation and furrow your eyebrows with worry. I suggest you take a gander.

Here's a few snippets of the art:

Cinephile's Delight

After watching Woody Allen’s seminal masterpiece, Annie Hall, I was certain that he had reached his creative apex and that he would never be able to match the genius of that film ever again. Crimes and Misdemeanors proved me wrong. It was one of those rare occasions where I took great pleasure in being proved wrong. Crimes and Misdemeanors is a 107-minute film that showcases the wonderful talent that has transformed Allen into one of the most respected screenwriters and directors of the New Hollywood era.

The film is set in New York City, like Most of Allen’s cinematic output. Martin Landau plays Judah Rosenthal, a successful ophthalmologist and Woody Allen plays Cliff Stern, a failed documentary filmmaker. They are the film's two main characters, both of whom are confronted with grave moral dilemmas.

The film examines a multitude of issues such as the value of human life, the tragedy of death, and the implications and immoralities of infidelity and murder. But don’t be so morose over the bleak drama. This might be Allen's most mature movie to date, but it's with his legendary tact that Allen once again effectively manages to mix comedy and drama. Much of the dialogue, in typical Woody Allen fashion, will send you into some intense lollercoaster rides, if I may be so eloquent. But enough of my ramblings. Go watch.

Sundays Are For Yummy Things

Today we have: 

• A cupcake recipe that everyone loves, that won't make you obese, and Christian likes them, and Enver doesn't yell at me too much. 
• A book review that proves my food philosophy is not off the mark. 

First (and yummiest), may I present, Protein Powder Vanilla Cupcakes.

These are delicious, light and fluffy cupcakes that look just like the ones from the grocery store, taste just as good, but for half the Enver-grief, and double the Christian-appreciation.  Onward!

Ingredients: 

• 2 whole, large eggs
  
• 1/4 cup of mashed bananas
  
• 2 teaspoons of honey
  
• 1/2 teaspoon of Pure Vanilla Extract
  
• 1 scoop of Vanilla Whey Protein Powder
  
• 1/4 cup of Quick Oats
  
• Baking time: 15 minutes
  
• Makes 24 mini cupcakes. 
  

I will assume for the following steps that you have a blender.  My kitchen resides in the stone ages, where we crush things with the meat mincer and blend with the hand beaters.  

I digress. 

With your blender, beat the eggs for about 30 seconds, until they're superduper fluffy.  This is very important.  Fluffy eggs make for fluffy cupcakes.  No fluff = No good. 

Add the honey and mashed bananas and blend for another 30 seconds.  This may look disgusting, but actually makes the cupcakes fluffier and tastier.  I prefer bananas that aren't already mushy.  The just ripened ones make for the best batter.  

Now, add the Pure Vanilla Extract. None of that grocerystore-fake-processed crap.  Vanilla is a delicate flavour.  The difference is notable.  Did you know that the fake stuff is made by soaking pretend vanilla wood and then burning it? Who wants to eat that, when the real stuff is so much better?

Next, throw in the protein powder, followed by the oats.  This is the part where the blender is most helpful.  No one wants oat chunks in their cupcakes.  Blend, blend, blend!  Make it smooth and battery.  

I like mini cupcakes because they're cuter. You should too.  Put about a tablespoon and a half of batter into each mini cupcake cup.  Bake for 15 minutes at 175C.  

To make them the prettiest they can be, top with whipped cream and sprinkles.  Mmmmm. 

(Low fat whipped cream is gross.  Don't even go there.  Read the book. It says you're allowed)

On the side, I suggest a glass of sparkling something, and the cheerful little book by Mireille Guiliano, French Women Don't Get Fat.  

The book is autobiographical, based on the author's experience as an exchange student who went to America and came back fat.  It then explores the advice she recieves upon her return home, unlocking the 'secrets' of eating indulgently without the unpleasantness of not fitting into jeans, diets, or guilty eating.  While the latter half of the book is more cookbook than story, it still makes for an enjoyable read.  The suggested foods are on the tasty side.  Most importantly, however, it works as proof to my theory that these boys are goofy, and I can eat whatever the hell I want. So there.

Infinite Corridor

As a Playstation 3 owner, I never would have expected games such as LittleBigPlanet, Pixeljunk Monsters, and especially echochrome, to be developed and sold on the PSN Store for as little as $10 USD. But then again, I did only buy a PS3 for Metal Gear Solid 4... but we'll talk about that later.

Available for PS3 and PSP, echochrome is incredible in the fact that it's such a simple puzzle game that is both addicting and innovative. The only objective is to guide your mannequin figure safely through the level - "shift the perspective, and follow the echo." The controls are incredibly simple, and the soundtrack consists of mainly violins. The soothing strings really do help contain you when the levels increase in difficulty.

The entire structure of the seemingly basic game is around the famous artwork of Escher and five perpetual laws that govern the echochrome universe:

Going through the demo was a unique experience, as you can see that the game forces you to change visual perspective you're used to in our world. I haven't actually purchased the game yet, but I plan to when I'm done with the adventure that is Grand Theft Auto IV. There are 56 exclusive levels for the PS3 and PSP (112 unique levels overall) and players are able to generate from scratch their own levels using the level editor, and share with the world, for free! I can only imagine some of the ridiculous puzzles that can be created. The violins won't be able to save me there...

Sweet Strawberry Jams

I've been revelling lately in three delicious bands that can simply be described as aural sex. Coincidentally, they all have the word "black" in their monikers.

The Black Keys - myspace.com/theblackkeys

This duo delivers a fine blend of blues and rock. They're often compared to The White Stripes, although, they certainly do have their own signature sound. Danger Mouse produced their latest release, "Attack and Release", which lead to a more polished sound, while still remaining faithful to the band's signature sound. I just hope their musical genius doesn't forever linger in the shadows of The White Stripes.

Black Rebel Motorcycle Club - myspace.com/blackrebelmotorcycleclub

Any band that references "The Third Man" on their album cover will instantly have my attention. BRMC is exceptionally innovative. Garage rock with undertones of psychedelic rock, shoegazing, blues, noise, americana and uhhh... this is exhausting. Just take a listen. It will be a rewarding experience.

Black Mountain - myspace.com/blackmountain

Balls-to-the-wall psychedelic rock. Also, the sharing of the vocals between Stephen McBean and Amber Webber will make you swoon.

Introduction

We are sorry to disappoint you if you were looking for a blog concerning the famous American Black Muslim minister and sociopolitical activist. The blog’s name is actually derived from one of our comrades’ numerous intellectual lowlights.

The team of writers consists of Alexa, Christian and myself, Enver; three bored university students with a lot to say on our minds.

Whatever tickles our fancy, will likely be posted. This includes music, movies, books, humour, pop culture, art, maybe some passionate tirades about important topics and perhaps even sporadic updates about Vladimir Putin’s latest shenanigans.

Cheers.